Monday, August 31, 2009

Bring on those lemons....

...'cause I LOVE me some lemonade!

What? I'm sure that is what you are asking yourself. Well today started a new swim schedule for the group that I've been swimming with. I really didn't want to do more than 1800m today as this is my taper week so I decided to go to the gym and swim by myself. Ugh, the water was cold as I'm used to swimming outside at noon when it is 100 degrees (or close to it) and that helps the water feel refreshing. Not so much. So I started off, my first 200m being sloppy as they always are until I get into a rhythm. I ended up doing my 1800m, which made me feel better as I'm freaking out about the tri.

Anyway, when swimming with the group we use a facility called the Courtyard Tennis Club (fancy schmancy) and they have a nice locker room...complete with hairdryers so I don't have to lug mine around. Well...my gym does NOT have hair dryers and there is no.way.in.hell. that I can go without blow drying my hair into a style. It's too short and too dysfunctional. That meant that I had to go home after my swim. Luckily my home, work and gym are all within 5 miles of each other. Trainer had jury duty today and apparently it ended early as the Tahoe was in the driveway. I walk in and it's pretty quiet, the dogs greet me at the door and Trainer is nowhere in sight. I walk a little further in and see that the tv is on, ESPN and Trainer is just waking up on the couch. Nice huh? He didn't even have to get up early this morning (early for him is like 4:30am!)

I said, "So...whatcha up to dude?" (yes, just like that) and he said, *yawn* "Just got up...took a nap." I said, "Must be nice!" and then went about my business of drying my hair before it froze into something that couldn't be undone. After I was finished he came up behind me and was being...frisky. So, I played along (I don't think he expected me to) and got him into bed. ;) FUN! The best part was that I was already late getting back to work and I really didn't care. I'll just work a little later... To top it all off he made me a latte for my drive back to work. Two of my favorite things...ahhh, and all because things didn't go exactly as planned. I love when that happens.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

A year in review

So, I'm 36 now...birthday has come and gone with very little hoop-la. And I'm okay with that. It doesn't really feel like my birthday this year as I said in my last blog. Yoga Zen Babe thinks that maybe I'm growing up. Ha, I don't think that's the case, I just think my focus is on the race. Sports Mama asked me if I was doing anything fun and I replied with, "No, because I really can't drink..." and she politely reminded me that we don't need to drink to have fun. I heard that once from my Soul Mate on our way to Mexico when we were 19...yeah, that didn't work out like we thought it would as I was drinking bottles of wine through a straw out of an ice bucket with The Director. I know, maturity has escaped me throughout my life.

I hope to have a new reader soon - Audrey. She's an old friend from HS. We weren't close then, she was a year older and had a cooler circle of friends. Sports Mama wanted me to put my blog link on my FB, thinking that people would just ignore it unless they were truly interested. I just can't take that chance. I have work people and relatives on my FB friends, who have time on their hands...lot's of time. Anyway, I like to keep my semi-anonymous blog close to the vest. So, with that said, please give a warm welcome to Audrey. And yes, the blog does get interesting some times. :)

Anyway, on to the meat of it all... 35 to 36 was good. Trainer and I learned a lot about each other throughout this year. Still learning... When I had my chart done in 2002 the astrologist said that our relationship was like a partnership and that we would learn lessons from each other throughout our lifetime. That has been pretty accurate over these 10 years. I believe that we've learned to appreciate each other in ways that we hadn't seen before. For him it was seeing my never-ending support of his whole person. The highs, the lows, the bright spots and most certainly the dark. For me it was seeing, finally seeing, that most of what he does around the house or during his day is to make my life easier. He rarely (if ever) makes the complaint that I don't do enough around the house. (Because we all know that I don't!!)

Work wise I have learned that I am still adaptable. I've also learned that I am the brightness in the office. Any office. When I went back to visit my friends in AZ a few years back I stopped by my old workplace. I stopped to say hello to everyone, as everyone was a friend, and a girl in the front said, "I forgot how much life you brought to this place." I didn't think to much of it at the time, but now at my new job I see that I am the glue there as well. I bring the lightness, the laughter (even when I'm all sorts of pissed off), and the compassion that is missing. I know that sounds totally conceited, but it's true. Maybe that is why I'm drawn to the sun, as in the three tattoos on my back. The sunshine is always with me as it is IN me. Hmmm...ponder that.

I have learned that my family really matters to me. This may seem like a 'duh' statement, but really...since I was 3 we've done nothing but move away from family and I continued that trend when I chose to go out of state to college and then again when I decided not to go back. And then again when we moved to Texas. In this past year I lost my grandfather and I was able to see my family all together for the first time in 5 years. Trainer's family came for Thanksgiving last fall. It was nice having them around and I crave that closeness more than I ever have. Our renewal ceremony is coming up and I'm thrilled that my parents and his parents will be there.

I've learned that I'm capable of anything, even if it is a physical/athletic thing. When I was on my ride yesterday I was chatting with this girl. I asked her how long she'd been doing triathlon and she said 4 years, but that she'd been an athlete her whole life. She asked me the same thing and I responded with, well...I just started doing this training in June, but I've been riding for 5 years and running since 2004 out of necessity. She asked if I did sports as a kid and I said, "No, I was a music geek turned music major." Then she asked if I was a music teacher and I said, "No, I went in to accounting." And that made her laugh. I never thought I could swim, actually sustain a freestyle stroke for longer than one length in the pool. And now I know I can.

And finally I've learned that my weight has nothing to do with anything. It doesn't make people like you better if you're lighter. It doesn't make someone love you more because there is less of you. Weight does not have to make or break the day, it is Just.A.Number. Living life and enjoying myself and not living in excess is the key to my happiness and my confidence.

Huh, maybe I am growing up after all.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Birthday week

You know, it's just not as exciting this year. Don't get me wrong, I still LOVE, LOVE, LOVE my birthday, but this year it's just not...what word am I looking for...special? It has nothing to do with the age, 36 to me is just 36, just like 35 was last year. Maybe because I'm training for something that (in my mind) is spectacular? Maybe THAT is what I'm looking forward to?? Which would be funny because I realize how hard and painful the day will be...despite my hours and hours of training.

Hmmm, just can't put my finger on it. Trainer asked me when I wanted my birthday dinner and I asked, "What pizza? We can just get frozen on Friday." and he said, "I was thinking Tomo and Amy's" and I said, "Yum, now that sounds good. Friday or Saturday would be good" and he came back with, "Your choice!" Tomo is my hands down FAVORITE sushi place in Austin and Amy's Ice Cream is to die for....love it. And now I haven't responded back. Should I go Friday or Saturday? Huh. Friday I have to swim 2000m in open water some place and Saturday I have to do some other ridiculous run/ride combo I'm sure. Anyway...see how "eh" I am about my favorite day of the year?

I had a great swim practice today, everything was clicking and I even the coach noticed! He was impressed by my improvement over the past week (I only see him on Wednesdays) and how little he had to correct me. It was awesome. AND even after he said something it was still clicking!

No weight loss to date, but I'm getting toned. Weight loss wasn't a big goal this time anyway, I just want to finish the race. OH, I can't believe I forgot...I received my wetsuit. I think I look like...well, not great. However, Yoga Zen Babe said I look like a super hero. If that super hero can swim a mile in under an hour I'll take it!!! I'll let you decide.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Mindless Monday

That is how I feel today...mindless...or that I've left my mind in bed. I'm exhausted and have no idea why. My body is needing about 9 hrs of sleep these days, solid sleep at that. It's crazy, I've never been a big sleeper, it's very difficult for me to even nap!

Maybe the training is catching up with me? Maybe my blood meds are off? Something is up. Trainer thinks it's my meds because any time they are off I sleep like the dead, cannot wake up. Ugh.

I joined a triathlon training group called T3. Maybe I'll have some fun stories about random people soon. No fun stories of my own yet. I still loathe swimming. I can't wait for the day when I can get in the pool and feel comfortable, unlike now where I get in the pool and struggle for the first 200 meters. It sucks. How the hell am I going to swim 1500 meters straight? Fuuuhhhhh....

I did discover something this weekend, well...not really this weekend, but a realization about myself. I am a finish line junkie. I was discussing this with Yoga Zen Babe over tea on Saturday (LOVE HER!) She has a friend in Phoenix who she calls a birth junkie, the woman LOVES giving birth (apparently if done correctly and natural you get a semi-high while giving birth - odd.) I have no conception of comparisons to this...but then I started thinking (thick smoke here people)...

Maybe I'm a finish line junkie. (Not that finishing a race and childbirth are even in the same league.) I love finishing things, most of all races. I could be struggling and cursing everything under the sun while I'm going up a steep climb on foot or on a bike. My lungs can be burning, muscles aching, mind just numb...but, when I see that finish line I get this boost. Suddenly my legs are able to turn over faster, I am able to smile at the photographer on the ground, I sprint towards the line an WAH-LAH!!! SUCCESS. I even manage to take "decent" post-race photos.

Are you a junkie of some kind? An applause junkie? An attention junkie? A knitting junkie? I'd be curious to see what people get "high" on.

Well, I'm at work, but I figured 'why not blog?' so I did. Now it's time to psyche myself up for swim practice. NOT a swimming junkie, I don't think I would be...even with a finish line.

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Just a quickie

Quickies are sometimes the best aren't they? :) HAHAHA!

Rode 40 miles this morning with T3 (Total Triathlon Training - a group that I may join) and it was cool. Although I rode 36 of it by myself.

Now, it's time to get our ass on the road and head up to Dallas for Cruefest 2! I'm stoked, although a bit tired so hopefully they'll be a Starbuck's on the way. I'll blog about the concert and stuff tomorrow! Peace out Peeps! - RA

Sunday, August 2, 2009

It's been a while

So, yes...it's been a while since I last blogged. And really, there is no good reason, I just didn't feel like it. :) Well, maybe I just wasn't motivated to do it.

Anyway, I had my triathlon on July 12th, one of the most challenging physical feats that I've attempted thus far. Not sure I like it yet....still, but again, waiting for the big tri to decide. That is the Austin Triathlon on Sept. 7th. If you live in Austin I'm going to recruit you to run a short segment of the run with me to get me to the end! Haha, don't think I'm kidding people!! After swimming a mile, biking 25 miles I'll need some help getting through the 6 miles of running.

I really wanted to give a blow by blow of the tri, but now so much time has passed that it doesn't seem that interesting to write about.

On July 20th, I had my annual Dr. Day Out. I take a sick day at work and go through all the poking and prodding for the year. I started at 6:45am for my doppler on my leg and ended with a pap at 4:30pm. Oh, and my smash-o-gram appt was on Tuesday at lunch. This was an emotionally draining two days, which leaked its way into the rest of the week. I don't know what it is... Well, not true, I do know what it is. See last year's post Fear and that is part of it, and the smash-o-gram brings back the memory of when they told me about my mom's breast cancer which is the other part of it. I was a senior in HS, and they told me during 6th hour choir....why did they tell me in school? I have no idea. Probably because they were rushing around from Dr to Dr and I would wonder where everyone was...or something like that. Again, who knows. And...again...although I know in my heart of hearts that I am very healthy the thoughts creep into my head.

And everything came back within normal ranges. So, my heart of hearts is still right. I'm golden, with the exception of my irrational mind. :) Ha.

Today I went out for a ride. I have five weeks of training until the big day. I love my schedule (thank you MWG!!!) and follow it as close as I can. My ride was lovely, and I'm not even kidding. At first I thought it was going to suck. It is SUPER humid out today, and we have a chance of thunderstorms. Trainer went downtown for a run so I was stuck going out on my own...down Parmer, my usual route. BORING. But as I started I felt great and was loving the overcast skies. (Oh Oh...AND I got new lenses for my Oakley's yesterday just for days like today so I was stoked that I got to try them out!) The wind was mild and the humidity felt kind of like being at the beach...sans the sand and ocean.

I realized a couple of things on my ride, things that I KNOW, but have to remind myself every once in a while.

One - not everything is about me. I know...shocker. Really. See, I thought Trainer was going to go out with me this morning and we could ride 360 (much harder route), but he was actually going to run down at Town Lake. So, I was a little miffed, for no good reason b/c he never told me that he was going to go with me.

Two - Trainer and I have very different goals, although they mirror each other in some ways (like the basic - staying fit and healthy), they are not the same. Trainer is trying to achieve a new PR for his 1/2 marathon distance in November, while I am trying to get through this Triathlon in one piece. He needs to focus on his running and I need to focus on juggling three different disciplines.

Three - I don't need to rely on anyone but myself. I like training on my own. It gives me time to think. Now, don't get me wrong, I do like some social runs thrown in there, but for the most part when I have a goal in mind (such as this triathlon) I like to do it MY way. I like to push myself BY myself. I don't do well trying to keep up with others and I don't do well when I feel like I'm being held back. Which is why I haven't wanted to run with the democrat lately. If she were running at the same pace as me right now it would be one thing...but she's not.

These are the things that were going through my mind on my awesome ride today. I even got sprinkled on half way through my ride. I had a smile on my face the entire time, in my new cool lenses, all the way to the end. I hope that I can channel this day on September 7th.