I FUCKING HATE THE FUCKING WIND! I had a really shitty ride today. I don't even know what the wind speed was today...hold on I'll look it up. 10-20mph winds with gusts. I was SOOOO angry (and obviously it hasn't abated yet...) on the way out. We had head wind and cross winds...meaning the ride in won't be fabulous and carefree. PLUS the fact that you're already beaten down by the ride out. I'm NOT a happy camper...at all. I'm being a sulky baby.
At one point Trainer had stopped, just so I could catch up and make sure that I was okay. And of course I bit his head off b/c when he does that it makes me feel even SLOWER...if that is even possible. Really I wasn't even mad at him, I was mad that I suck so bad. I was cursing all the people that were riding on their way back b/c I was jealous. What I really wanted to do was to stop and throw my bike at something. Lot's of rage today. And no, I'm not even pms-ing!!! I'm just angry, angry angry. Angry that after years of riding my bike I don't seem to be much better.
To top it off my bike is not shifting correctly after I just had it in the shop for its annual tune-up. To down shift on a hill I have to basically STOP pedaling...uh...great, then I have to work that much harder in the middle of a fucking hill to get going again...genius. I only got in 55 miles, just about the same as last week. Saturday is the 95 mile ride. I'm so screwed. At least there SHOULD be people that are slower than me so I won't feel like a fucking beginner.
In other news...well...I can't even think of anything right now. I need to go stretch and shower and maybe sleep.
4 comments:
Aw that sucks. I'm sorry you are feeling frustrated. It is frustrating, so don't beat yourself up for being angry. And by the way, you don't suck. Wind gusts like that can knock you off your bike, so at least you were still in one piece. My bike is shifting all fucked up, too. What the hell?
Keep at it, and I'll see you soon! I should be doing homework right now, but nope...ugh. 2 more weeks!
Ha, ha! Honey, I could totally relate with this ranting post (in my own way, of course). I've been in such a whiny, sulking baby-sort-of mood the last few days. I've had lots of friends having babies lately (perfectly healthy, no problems whatsoever deliveries) and I'm just plain jealous and feeling sorry for myself. Ugh! I HATE feeling like that!! I hate that I'm capable of feeling such uncontrollable envy. It just sucks! All I can say is at least you and I can both realize that we are just in a mood, a funk, what-have-you. We know what we've got and are thankful but I think we're both totally entitled to a rant once in awhile. Wave that angry flag, baby! ;) Love you!
I just did a little skimming and managed to not be upset by swearing at all... of course, I probably didn't get the whole effect that way either...
A few years ago our family went on a bike ride - and while on a little break ManOfTheHouse decided to try out MY bike... bye bye rear derailers (hmmm... that's spelled wrong I know, but any other attempt will make me look MORE foolish) - this is when I was thankful that we had a little one so I had an excuse to walk the bike home and that said little one had not been tolerant of a very far away ride in the first place... a mile home wasn't too bad.
Would it help at all to learn that I am, in fact, slower than you? At just about every damn thing? No, that doesn't help? Well, hell.
Ranting is good. Ranting is healthy. Ranting is like a huge bubble of air.....
Better out than in. ;)
Love you, darlin'!
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